Leadership isn't always easy
Wow, leadership! Sometimes you just wouldn't want it, would you?
I'm tired tonight. It’s Friday, homeward bound.
Bit frustrated. Bit over it. Bit wanting to bite the head off an anaconda!
Feels like a very hard week, this week – felt bullied by a leader, felt misunderstood by another, felt that it was a struggle to help another bunch. Worried about some staff issues, and concerns over budget. Plans that I thought were locked in for two major clients got changed. I had a lot of travel and was away from home most of the week, so I didn't sleep enough. I got really pissed off with some testosterone fueled kids drag racing in a street close to my hotel. At 12am. Two nights in a row. ‘Thanks’ felt thin on the ground. I worked stupid hours. Oh, and I think I feel fat.
As a leader, mostly, I don’t feel this way. But sometimes I just want to shout out, “leading is not always easy!” Try hard as I might, I don’t always behave in a way that is effective. Sometimes I don’t achieve what I set out to achieve. Sometimes I don’t consistently role model what I aspire to role model. Sometimes the budgets don’t work, the targets aren't met. Sometimes the challenge of the everyday slog of helping something happen just seems insurmountable.
Tonight I'm wishing someone would discover me, how clever and able I am, and pay me a fortune for what I am able to do. Tonight I wish that it didn't matter so much to me that things work out well for everyone. Tonight I’d like to say a few choice words to a few people and not give a damn about the consequences.
It’s not who I am 90% of the time, just this week. But I suspect there are a few people out there saying “I told you so,” “I knew she couldn't cut the chase!”
I'm holding my hand off the scotch, and trying not to reach for the chocolate.
Anyone else have weeks like this?
Written by Fabian Dattner, Partner Dattner Grant
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